I’ve found that since the TD all sorts of things have changed. In spite of the fact (or paradoxically because of it) that I don’t now eat sugar, I am watching “The Great British Bake Off” with embarrassing delight. Yet anything to do with ‘stuff’ (bichli bithia) now leaves me untouched and you all know how I’ve always loved my bits and pieces.
So it’s all change on some levels. But all stays solid beneath my feet.
Philosophically I remain intact. Nothing the last months have thrown at me alters my deep conviction that a greater plan exists. A plan that is unknowable to those of us locked within 3D form. While those who think they know better struggle to find that one thing that connects everything, I quietly wonder whether such a discovery would, in fact, change what we think of as reality.
For we search for that which is without, using perception, which lies within.
It seems to me that we have evolved like a train going along the track. Only when we arrive at the buffers will we know the story of the whole, and that the whole is just…a track. Not the vast landscape that it sits within.
Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh, otherwise known as Osho, said there is only one courage and that is to go on dying to the past. Not to collect it, not to cling to it. He says we do that because then we are unavailable to the present which is the difficult part, as it is in the now that pain and suffering exist.
I have been given one of life’s richest gifts. I have been informed that my time is nearly up in the starkest of ways.
‘Come in number 7′, the boatman calls on his megaphone and I start paddling to the shore. This is when every ripple on the lake has meaning and every hint of birdsong pierces the heart. This now-ness forces me into my authentic place, as every moment becomes encrusted with its finite beauty. From where I am sitting life has suddenly become too real, too colourful, too precious to be wasted on anything but sensory wonder. I look out of my window and I see the trees and they are so very green they take me like a lover and deposit me in a higher state of being. This and all the other peak experiences I am being offered at this time mean I am growing fast now towards the meeting, the communion, the encounter. God is not something that is already there, but is something that appears when I am totally conscious. To reach that state I have to let go of all other states. I have been given the chance to practice this.
We are here for such a short time and we are so very small. Joy and gratitude abound.
But sometimes I need downtime. And that’s where’The Great British Bake Off’ comes in.