The Call of the Profound

imagesimagesTimothy Spall, who opens in the Mike Leigh film ‘Mr Turner’ later this week, had a terminal diagnosis for leukaemia a few years ago. He was on a chat show this last night and I was interested to hear him say that the experience took him into a state of great profoundness. Everything he observed was almost painfully expanded into that state of beauty that great opera touches upon. He could not suffer bullshit and only wanted to engage in the deep and meaningful. He knew he was getting better when he started moving back into the slight and general.
I am not yet in at that stage, though I am in a place that I really love. My days are filled with chicken soup making and organic vegetable buying. I am resisting juicing and enemas but I reading an inspiring book by Michael something Tosh who resisted conventional treatment and lived ten years after his terminal diagnosis.
PS I wrote the above a month ago. Things have gone downhill since then. I find myself in a state of profoundness. I spend my days on the sofa watching a blackbird pecking at the last remaining elderberries. People come and visit and in the spaces between I reflect on a long and adventurous life and I prepare myself for the greatest adventure of all. I am content in my little world. It seems that it’s come full circle this long life of mine and I am caught up in the profound wonder of the exact nature of our being.

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