Monthly Archives: June 2010

A Hoot to Hang With

 At the bottom of the Grand Canyon there is a dump. Actually it was once a swimming pool but in the 60’s it became a health hazard and was filled in, with all sorts of stuff that had  found its way down the Canyon in the hedonistic 30’s, including rumour has it, a grand piano. Of all the stories I’ve heard on my travels, this is the one that has most fired my imagination. I love skips and charity shops, as you know. Imagine what I would find if I started digging down there. I had to go and at least view the site.

So now I know what ‘down there’ means, for I have walked the Bright Angel and spent two nights at the bottom of the Canyon. I did the hike to celebrate my sixtieth birthday and it took me, armed as I was with two Leki and knee bandages, to the edge of my stamina.

But what a journey! The shadow pictograms, still as cathedrals between the buttes and mesas; the condors crying overhead. And far beyond the sight the tourists get on the rim, the switchback trail down to the aquamarine river, now sadly no longer as potent as it was when it carved this incredible gash in the earth’s crust.

Once the whole earth was this quiet. It took Zizi and myself seven hours to reach the vishnu schist on the bottom, formed two billion years ago. It was down there that I learned the meaning of the words,’ The Grand Canyon is not a place at all but rather a state of understanding.’ I was changed by the experience.

At the bottom there is a place called the Phantom Oasis, lying at the junction of two creeks. Here in the depth of the mystery is a Mary Coulter-designed ranch known as Phantom Lodge. All trails end here and in order to do the full hike one has to have accommodation booked (two years in advance when we did it.)

The trails in the canyon were put there by an amazing group of young men known as The Civilian Conservation Corps in the 1920’s. When it opened in 1922, Phantom was an exclusive resort. The swimming pool was 19 feet deep and folding French doors opened onto the patio. The rich travelled down by mule and no luxury was denied them on arrival.

In 1941 when Pearl Harbour was attacked, the last conservation camps were closed and the young men went to war. By the late 50’s, early sixties the pool was polluted by 800 swimming bodies a night and health and safety decreed that it be filled in with all the ‘old junk’ which had gathered that no one was going to carry back out. So the pool became a landfill site and thus ended an era.

Today Coulter’s beautiful cabin is the cookhouse and dining area and the hikers are housed in boys and girls dorms.The food down there is simple and unbelievably delicious. Steak or Nut Loaf with baked potatoes and salad, followed by a generous square chocolate fudge slab cake-every night.The cooks are youngsters earning money for university.

At night, as the dusk falls desert- fast and the huge moon gazes over the rim, bats fly and people gather for a pre supper talk on the wildlife  of the Canyon.Then it’s food and a walk before bedtime which is pure dorm. Women from all over the world, strangers until arrival, sleepily sharing their funniest stories as exhaustion after the climb waits to claim each one for the best night’s sleep ever. Next morning at breakfast someone declared Zizi, ‘a hoot to hang with’. I couldn’t disagree.

After two night’s rest Zizi and I left to make the climb out, at 5.30 in the morning. There was no one else in sight, just the two of us and the vaste green river, which we walked beside at a meditative pace. Then the trail veered to the left and we seemed to reach a point where a 40 year friendship, the Colorado River and the vast landscape of rock came together in one delicious moment.

 “Thank you Zizi,” I said. It seemed enough. She turned around and called, “I couldn’t have done this without you, Allie,”  and with that we entered the side canyon and started the upward climb.


Only Connect!

It was E.M.Forster who famously encouraged us to ‘only connect’ and how right he was. Isolation and loneliness are the scourges of the age, which is why so many fall into the elephant trap of addiction; addiction creates the temporary illusion of connectedness, sadly very short lived. So what provides a more concrete sense of well being or grace in this new world, founded as is is on Heisenberg’s great Theory of Uncertainty? We each of us find our own path to grace. Mine is bordered with lavender, sage, rosemary and thyme. Literally.

The garden in The Warren is thriving this year, as we’ve been having lots of sunshine and herbs really do love the sun. When I am out there pottering, I am connecting with something very profound. Myrtle tells me that my garden is full of spirit and sometimes in the early morning, as the sun comes up over the roofs opposite, it takes my breath away. It is at times like this, that I remember that it is important to translate my blessings to my own backyard. There’s a lifetime of wisdom in that last sentence , believe me. I am meditating as I garden. I am also communicating at a deep level with something I don’t understand. I guess it is with the elementals. There is definitely a silent communication going on; a communion even.

I get the same feeling when I contemplate crop circles. An All-seeing eye has just come in, next to the mysterious Chesterton Windmill in Warwickshire. It has appeared close to the site of the 3D Pyramid of 2009. Both are beautiful. I know that the locals will be sighing and the pubs will be full of cynical talk about the clever students from the famous maths dept of The University of Warwick close by. This doesn’t bother me. Once the circle is laid it becomes something else and starts to speak in a language of its own. What it says is different to each recipient. To me, meditating on circles and their shapes brings a deep and profound sense of calm. They speak, after all, in shapes and uplift the soul with the interchange of pattern and energy. They are profoundly natural.

D’ Arcy Wentworth Thompson, a man whose name I deeply envy, had plenty to say on growth and form, including the following:

“It behoves us always to remember that in physics it has taken great men to discover simple things.”  I like it already!  He continues,”They are very great names indeed which we couple with the explanation of the path of a stone, the droop of a chain, the tints of a bubble, the shadows in a cup.”

There is a subtle undertow to this statement that links it in my mind to the circles. Say what you might about them, the answers appear strangely bland compared to the experience of being with them. It is not the conscious that they are appealing to, but the unconscious. Something is being reawakened and they are assisting in the process. What impacts one impacts all. This is important. When the crop in laid completely, accurately, quickly, it is done so via communication of some sort. A sense of consciousness in the land is returning via our unconscious. It is a simple dance of form and we have our instructions. Only connect!

Half Way

“Lighten up Mumsie, no wonder your blog isn’t taking off like Julie’s.” That’s Mimi giving her IT challenged mother some support. We had been watching Julie and Julia.”You could so do a food blog-you’re an amazing cook”. I can hardly keep up with the way young people talk, let alone blog, but I accepted the compliment. I think she’s missed the point of what I’m trying to do when introducing the world to my world. I’m actually not that interested in food any more. As you’ve probably noticed I’m on a bit of a mission.

I have been blogging now for six months and have learned a great deal about the process. I have also learned that it is quite difficult to catch and retain the interest of others, so I was keen to get Mimi’s view on things. I do know that I’m up against some stiff competition- There were, after all, 200,000,000 posts on WordPress last month. That’s a lot of noughts.

Sometimes I am writing about things that are relevant to women my age. Post menopause/ zesty grannies if you like, who might identify with what I write about ageing and the inevitable loss of place that accompanies the slide into invisibility(unless one is going the lycra, dangly earring route) But most women my age are sensibly not  glued to computers-they are out there being zesty. But I made a personal commitment to a year of blogging and that’s what I’m going to do. Julie&Julia was a combination of food and car crash and I can see why her blog took off. Food and sex are always winning  subjects, though perhaps not together, not in my experience anyway.

The transition to the next spiritual level is not a winning subject; not yet, because it’s still not obvious what’s up ahead and people are too busy eating to notice. But Mimi’s words didn’t fall on deaf ears, so I thought that , to add a little yeast to my blogging mix, today I would give you my capsule store cupboard food list, off the back of my pantry door.

In those far off days when I was working my socks off,  like poor Julie, during the day and coming home to an evening of catering (not I might add like her kamikasi cooking), I found this list invaluable. A cupboard with the following will get you out of trouble over and over again.

Plain Dark Chocolate
Dried Mushrooms
Pomegranate Molasses
Roasted Red Peppers in oil
Tinned chick peas
Spelt spagetti
Tinned mackerel in tomato sauce
Baked beans
Marigold stock
Quick Quaker oats
Bonite tuna in olive oil
Risotto rice
Brown basmati
Vacuum packed chestnuts
Walnut oil

With good olive oil , best balsamic, onions and garlic that keep for ages, you’re set up for creative cooking. I’ll start you off by suggesting that with cream and cardamom, the chocolate makes a to- die- for- sauce for everyday ice cream. I’d be interested to hear what you devise with the rest.

Or alternatively remember that a fast is the quickest way to cleanse the body. Oops not light enough!

A Girl’s Best Friend

I’ve always thought that a girl’s best friend is not diamonds but rather a copy of the I Ching. When you are flying solo as I am, big moves can be intimidating and it helps to have wisdom on your side. The I Ching is the oldest manuscript in existence  and throughout its 5000 year history has gained a patina of power that I find never lets one down. Dr Jung was a great fan, which is also in its favour, as far as I’m concerned. I use the Richard Wilhelm translation, with the Jung foreward, in which he says, ‘I myself think there is more to the Chinese way of thinking than meets the eye’. This, he continues, is a method of exploring the unconscious, that takes us to a place where the axioms of causality are shaken to their foundations,for if we leave things to nature we see a different picture. To the Chinese mind the jumble of natural laws holds more significance than temporal causality.(Doesn’t that remind you of  Gebser’s next mutation? Or indeed the view of the quantum world?) So the moment under observation is a chance hit and reveals, through the unconscious, what is asked of it.

The process I use for creating ‘the moment’  follows the ancient guidelines for the use of coins. (I’ve never been drawn to the alternative yarrow stalks for logistical reasons) I use three Chinese coins with holes in the middle, which I keep, as a mark of respect, in a tiny satin bag tied with a ribbon. On one side of each coin I’ve Tipp-Exed a white dot, to denote heads; the dotless side of course being tails. Tails have a value of 3 and heads have a value of 2.

First I sit down in a quiet place and gather my thoughts. Then on a sheet of paper I write a question concerning a decision I have to make, the answer to which can be an encouragement to move forward or a warning to stand still. I only use the I Ching for life changing decisions, again out of respect for the process.

 Then I write the numbers 1-6 from the bottom up, after which I hold the coins, with the intent of the question uppermost in my mind, for a few moments. Then I throw them six times, noting the number of heads and tails for each row. Thus I produce two sets of trigrams (as I said from the bottom up) and having  added up the scores I get the numbers 6, 7, 8 or 9. Thus I have six lines, each representing yang (7 :straight line), yin(8:broken line), moving yang (9:straight line with circle), or moving yin (6:straight line with cross). Moving lines offer the opportunity to create a different hexagram when additional information is called for.

I (or indeed you) now have a hexagram, of which there are 64 ( the same number as the codons in DNA, can you believe!) and the table of hexagrams at the back if the book is needed. A combination of the upper and the lower trigrams gives a hexagram, which will give the answer to the question asked. My experience over the years is that the answers always fit the questions with astonishing accuracy. Try it and see. I am convinced that the process reveals something about the nature of consciousness that Gebser and the circles are nudging us towards. When I throw the I Ching I get a sense of being cradled by the universe in my decision making. In a world of uncertainty this is a great gift.

A Pivotal Day

I never meant this to become a crop circle blog but that’s where it seems to be going. So be it; the flow and all that. Today is Saturday and a special one at that. A full moon in Capricorn will appear tonight (with eclipse) in an exact conjunction with Pluto, bringing with it unrest and revolution. Last night when I took Tottie for her walk, there it was, one day off  full, cradled in the trees at the end of my road, so round, full and shining that I had to run indoors and get my camera.

The next full moon (July26) falls in Aquarius and coincides with the most stressful planetary alignment of the year. This will be a pivotal day, setting the foundation for the next decade. So watch out.

Today here in England it is another glorious sunny, rosy day. We haven’t had a summer like this for a few years and I can’t get enough of my garden, where I tweak and toil to the sound of Wimbledon balls bouncing off rackets from countless neighbours’ televisions. Aunty Mu loves Wimbledon, so is happy, heating on full blast no doubt, door wide open, oblivious to a world in trouble and getting her pleasure somehow. ‘I sense what’s happening from the noise,’ she says on the phone,’ It is enough, Allie’.

It is enough. If only I could apply that to my life and relax. But a part of me is afraid that some apocalyptic beast is at this moment slouching our way. This is the trouble with blogging- it puts one in touch with a lot of doom mongering. Thank goodness for Michael Glickman whose book The Bones of God (great title) I’ve been reading this week, along with Gebser and the autobiography of Tony Curtis. The crop circle on the cover is the Barbury castle Pi, the lines of which I have walked myself. In 2008 Jean Claude and I visited several circles and this was one of them. We were puzzled at the time by the rachets, never having seen such a thing before. We didn’t know that day that it mapped Pi or that the bridal path that made it so easy to enter became one side of the square that squared the circle, thus symbolically linking heaven and earth.

Glickman argues that circles are a form of communication, rather than messages. Subtle difference. They are playful and work with numbers and symbols that mean something to us. It is as if they are saying something as simple as ‘we are here to help you at this time’. They are in fact anything we want them to be. They are there to have an effect on us.

As we move into unexplored realms, some of us are noticing that intention produces results; that the universe dances in tune with human consciousness. The stunning realisation follows that this is what is meant by evolving conciousness. Think of how much more we know that our grandparents. We are being moved along the way, nudged by the numinous- for that is what the circles represent. They are beautiful, thought-provoking, geometrically awesome, creative, thought- related and beneficial to crops. What’s not to love?

The universe is sustained by an act of such stupendous creativity, it cannot be reduced to words, let alone equations. As Zen shows us there is an ultimate indivisibility of reality. We must learn to free it from the conceptual pigeonholes of our own making(David Bohm). When Edgar Mitchell returned, as so many of them did, changed by his visit to the moon, he said, ‘Learning is what we are on earth for. We create our own fate because our inner emotional reality draws us into situations from which we can learn’.  The greatest mystery about crop circles isn’t who makes them or what they mean. It’s why so many people refuse to accept them for what they are. However awe inspiring they become, people still think they are made with string and planks! That is the greatest mystery of modern times.

This morning a stunning glyph appeared in barley(see above). Thanks Chris Bird for being up there, and what a great example of nomclamative determinism! Next it will be wheat , the favoured crop for the most spectacular examples. Let us see them and accept them with joy and love. The more of us who see, the more fabulous they will become.

Ready Steady Jump!

How fickle is the unconscious mind! Gene Hunt has already faded into the spectre he always was. Ditto The Boy. Even though I dreamed of Daniel again last night, he was lying in a box and when I looked into his eyes, they turned albumen white. So maybe that’s it with men. Maybe now (at last) I am free to pursue something that offers more weight and depth than the chimera I have been chasing down my days. Maybe the dawning realisation that these days are not endless, has given me the necessary and natural impetus to move into a world that offers depth and weight and power; the world of developing consciousness.

It certainly makes me feel alive, which is good for a woman of my age. I met an acquaintance last night, who I hadn’t seen for a while. She looked different and was wearing a floaty low-cut dress. ‘I’ve left the bastard at last,” she told me in words that came tumbling out.”After 34 years I’ve left him and now I’m off to shag anything that moves.” I murmered a few words, mindful of Dorothy Rowe’s book Why We Lie. I wanted to say, “Stop. You’re running way too fast and this is going to end in tears,” but I didn’t. I just went on my way, thoughtfully contemplating the fate of ageing cougars and feeling very glad that this is a route I chose not to take some time back there.

So here I am, with a spring in my step, busying myself by fulfilling my contract with Source. As I said this is not without its dangers. Lala is always on the look- out for signs of the mad woman in the attic. This could be something as simple as a turquoise beret and matching scarf. As I wandered up the road this morning to the Farmers’ Market, basket on arm, I passed our local mad woman in the attic, leaning against the lamp post, fag in hand, dressed in a silver lycra jumpsuit and a huge black picture hat. She’s always beautifully turned out and if she lived in Manhattan she’d be snapped by the chap from Advanced Style for sure, but here she looks like a withering alien who’s waiting for her flight home. I always smile and invite contact but she’s already gone behind her eyes.

So I have to be careful, or rather I choose to be careful. Even so, my yoga teacher, Robert whispered in my ear as I did a shoulder stand the other day,”Don’t let the Mother ship carry you off Allie, we’d miss you.” I’d been talking about Gebser rather too enthusiastically before the lesson I guess. It’s changing my life, pursuing the unseen but so few people are on the case. No wonder The Boy disappeared with a rocket up his arse.

I must be doing the right thing, as I’m given direct guidance every inch of the way. This morning, before setting off on my organic veg. mission, I was cleaning my teeth with my yummy new fennel toothpaste when I found myself going to the bookshelves and extracting The Holographic Universe by Michael Talbot. I had ‘the feeling’ as I picked it off the shelf and it wasn’t just the electric toothbrush pulsing in my hand. I know when I am getting a hit. I love it. It’s a lot better than ‘shagging anything that moves’ to my mind. For a start it lasts longer.

So here I am, learning how to survive in infinity, preparing myself for my flight beyond the corset of matter. The crop circles and the UFO sightings are part of the preparation, as they provide a relatively limited confrontation with the imaginal. It’s a shamanic journey we are on, heading towards Omega, learning to manipulate the hologram of reality.

I am a midwife now, helping to birth a non-physical world, for we are living at the end of time. By this I don’t mean to scare you. It’s a perceptual change. As one journeys deeper into what Bohm called the implicate, reality becomes increasingly a frequency rather than something one can hold. Eventually this is all we will see. Then we will float like Blue Monarchs into a wonderland and know it as home. We are here to learn, which is something I’ve known since I was a child. Now I’m preparing to shout ‘Geronimo’ and go for it. I will then be catapulted into the all, where deep connectivity exists and subjective and objective are not separate. Division is fear-based. At a moment of synchronicity(e.g.when I feel the buzz from a book) I get a momentary glimpse of where I going. That’s why I love the feeling. In that moment I look into the heart of creativity and know it as home.

The Warren is a conceptual pigeon hole I have created to keep the Universe at bay. One day I will move on and, illuminated, I will escape into the endless simplicity of my purpose. Infinity. Hopefully you’ll come too, for this is a collective leap. It is our only hope.

The Lycra jump suit is not obligatory.

Will This Be The Year?

Checking out crop circles certainly brings one face to face with the uncomfortable. They are an intense experience. I have been in half a dozen; one was so fresh the energy made me cry.  That is, after all, their point -to reawaken us to meaning. Look at the latest, a beautiful reverse S-shape of links.  It came in on 16th June at Chirton Bottom, Wiltshire and comments have been slow to arrive. I think we are all dazed by the beauty. It is huge for a start. There are people wandering around in the photo to the left  but they are so small they don’t show up at this scale. Steve Alexander’s photograph is superb; does he hang from the base of the helicopter, I wonder?

The thing about circles is we can’t manipulate them. They are there in their entirety, like portholes into a new state of being. Something monumental this way comes. While half the world sits glued to television screens, we move ever so quietly towards a greater understanding of our inheritance; into a new sense of being. The circles are there to stretch our circuitry, so that we can see what we have never seen before.

Yet millions of people are being deprived of the opportunity to experience this consciousness-expanding phenomenon, because they are turned off by the baffling barrage of negative press. There are man- made circles for sure. Hoaxers act as a safety net for those frightened of what logic cannot explain. Then a circle arrives that really makes you think…

 There is so much that is inexplicable around the formations. An energy is alive in the fields of Wiltshire (and elsewhere) that needs decoding. Crop circles burst like raindrops.. splat… (thanks Terry Pratchett) where the walls between worlds have become weak . Where they happen, you can almost walk from one world to the next. But we’re not at that stage of perception yet…not quite, although we’re well on the way. For the last 15 years the formations have been getting increasingly complex. What they are telling us is important, in that a dialogue has been set in motion and as we stretch our consciousness, so too do we amplify our understanding. It’s worth following the debate on Crop Circle Connector. There is a particularly stimulating article by an Australian artist called John Scott which links alchemical symbols, the Ascii code and the crop circle that has just appeared in Poirino, Italy to come up with a reading. Have a look. It will illustrate what I mean by mind expanding!

Bees dance in this shape yet the chain had broken. The pattern is a reverse sigmoidal with two centres. 27 circles 28 dots. It is not as it appears. Time is not a constant;it is relative. Infinity is incomprehensible. In higher realities time does not exist. It is completely relative in terms of who experiences what and when at any given moment. The world that the circles are leading us into is non Eucidean and multidimensional, like holograms, quantum theory and multiple realities. Paradox abounds here. Time, space, light and dark are all bound together like entanglement theory. The Circlemakers are quantum physicists as well as harbingers. As consciousness moves from the 4th to the 5th level, we are being given guidance. We are on the brink of something huge while the world watches football.